That's it. I'm only 22.
Apparently, according to an online calculator my life expectancy is 92.
Meaning I have 70 years left, if I take care of myself. Which I try to do. I don't eat red meat or poultry. I don't smoke. I don't do drugs. I exercise a few times a week and need to step it up. I eat pretty healthy, no gluten or soy, limited amounts of dairy, I do need to eat less carbs though. I'm going to school, I have a lot of contact with friends/family.
So in statistical things I have a long life expectancy.
And I'm only 22.
Here are things I have done by 22...
-Graduated high school
-Attending university with a 3.0 GPA and getting two degrees, history and journalism
-Funded 2.5 month trip to Europe by myself at 19
-Took second trip to Europe at 22 for 2.5 months (Study Abroad)
-Visited a good chunk of places on my bucket list
-Lived by myself for a year
-Worked at two museums, one I had dreamed of working at since I was a little kid
-Bought half a NEW car with boyfriend
-Wrote a book (which I ended up hating and I am rewriting )
-I work at a really cool independant book store, as a weekend manager (another dream job)
-Made a long list of costumes for Halloween and other events
-I've acted in a lot of plays
-I've been to a beer fest in Germany
-I've been lucky to fall deeply in love with someone that loves me back
-Competed in horse shows
-Competed in singing competitions
-Worked on making myself a stronger, more loving and forgiving person through therapy and knowledge
-Battled demons from my past in the form of PTSD
-I'm lucky enough to help raise a really sweet 6 year old
-I've seen almost all of my favorite bands perform live (except The Beatles, but I saw a GOOD cover band in Florence, Italy)
-I have a lot of friends around the world, and I keep making more
- I had my own radio show with KCSU
-Volunteered at the library my mom works at
-Volunteered as help with a girl scout troop of younger girls
-Been to a lot of places I never thought I would actually get to go
When I look at this list, I don't anything that I haven't done that I wanted to...
By 22 I planned on being almost exactly where I am now.
I was hoping to live in another state and go to school, but out of state tuition and loans have kept me in Colorado, which is pretty okay. There are a lot of other things I have gained from being in good old Colorado. Like the small family I have with my boyfriend and his daughter. Or some great friends I have made, my job that I get to go to, the experiences I have had with music, and a long list of other things.
Oh I also had the idea that I could bull shit a book and get it published and not have to REALLY work at writing it. SURPRISE, it is a lot of work and not worth doing unless you put work into it. Good life lesson that.
There is nothing else I have not accomplished in my 22 years that I wish I had. I feel I have gone above and beyond that what I dreamed. Which is really cool.
Sometimes this world feels like it is meant to trip you up, that you're not good enough, talented enough, strong enough, or better than other people to get to where you are going. However, I recently had a teacher tell me what he thought about the rat race. Which is this: grades don't matter, school doesn't matter- learn and live to learn and live. Don't do it for a career, or worst- money. Do it for you. Don't worry about being better than anyone else, be better than you.
Be better than you.
I love that. I now see it's value. I don't have to have the same GPA as my other Journalism student friends, I don't have to make more money or go to a better school, or work for a better company or be a better writer. I just have to better than I was at some moment in my past. I just have to move forward for me, forward for my skills and my ideas, not what someone else wants. Not what society wants. I don't have to buy into the rat race, competitive mindset of my culture. I can break that.
"If you win the rat race, if you come in first place, than a rat is all you will be." ~DeVotchka
Who wants to be a rat? In the sense of someone being mean, stomping on toes and heads to get somewhere, throwing away love and relationships to be "better" than everyone around him.
The same teacher also told me that at the end of the day LOVE is the only thing that really matters, and I think he is right and to add to that he mentioned the importance of human connection and relationships.
I think I've also come to the conclusion that I would prefer to be happy and filled with a life of love than one filled with money, or a large amounts of control over something. I would prefer to be unknown than swallowed up in fame and prestige, in an image, in people gossipping or undermining me.
So all of you out there, if you are feeling like you haven't done a lot, make a list of everything you HAVE done and go over it. Make a list of things you HAVEN'T done that you wanted to by now and then start making them happen, or think what their importance is to you right now. Ask yourself, does it matter so much now that I know what I know?
Apparently, according to an online calculator my life expectancy is 92.
Meaning I have 70 years left, if I take care of myself. Which I try to do. I don't eat red meat or poultry. I don't smoke. I don't do drugs. I exercise a few times a week and need to step it up. I eat pretty healthy, no gluten or soy, limited amounts of dairy, I do need to eat less carbs though. I'm going to school, I have a lot of contact with friends/family.
So in statistical things I have a long life expectancy.
And I'm only 22.
Here are things I have done by 22...
-Graduated high school
-Attending university with a 3.0 GPA and getting two degrees, history and journalism
-Funded 2.5 month trip to Europe by myself at 19
-Took second trip to Europe at 22 for 2.5 months (Study Abroad)
-Visited a good chunk of places on my bucket list
-Lived by myself for a year
-Worked at two museums, one I had dreamed of working at since I was a little kid
-Bought half a NEW car with boyfriend
-Wrote a book (which I ended up hating and I am rewriting )
-I work at a really cool independant book store, as a weekend manager (another dream job)
-Made a long list of costumes for Halloween and other events
-I've acted in a lot of plays
-I've been to a beer fest in Germany
-I've been lucky to fall deeply in love with someone that loves me back
-Competed in horse shows
-Competed in singing competitions
-Worked on making myself a stronger, more loving and forgiving person through therapy and knowledge
-Battled demons from my past in the form of PTSD
-I'm lucky enough to help raise a really sweet 6 year old
-I've seen almost all of my favorite bands perform live (except The Beatles, but I saw a GOOD cover band in Florence, Italy)
-I have a lot of friends around the world, and I keep making more
- I had my own radio show with KCSU
-Volunteered at the library my mom works at
-Volunteered as help with a girl scout troop of younger girls
-Been to a lot of places I never thought I would actually get to go
When I look at this list, I don't anything that I haven't done that I wanted to...
By 22 I planned on being almost exactly where I am now.
I was hoping to live in another state and go to school, but out of state tuition and loans have kept me in Colorado, which is pretty okay. There are a lot of other things I have gained from being in good old Colorado. Like the small family I have with my boyfriend and his daughter. Or some great friends I have made, my job that I get to go to, the experiences I have had with music, and a long list of other things.
Oh I also had the idea that I could bull shit a book and get it published and not have to REALLY work at writing it. SURPRISE, it is a lot of work and not worth doing unless you put work into it. Good life lesson that.
There is nothing else I have not accomplished in my 22 years that I wish I had. I feel I have gone above and beyond that what I dreamed. Which is really cool.
Sometimes this world feels like it is meant to trip you up, that you're not good enough, talented enough, strong enough, or better than other people to get to where you are going. However, I recently had a teacher tell me what he thought about the rat race. Which is this: grades don't matter, school doesn't matter- learn and live to learn and live. Don't do it for a career, or worst- money. Do it for you. Don't worry about being better than anyone else, be better than you.
Be better than you.
I love that. I now see it's value. I don't have to have the same GPA as my other Journalism student friends, I don't have to make more money or go to a better school, or work for a better company or be a better writer. I just have to better than I was at some moment in my past. I just have to move forward for me, forward for my skills and my ideas, not what someone else wants. Not what society wants. I don't have to buy into the rat race, competitive mindset of my culture. I can break that.
"If you win the rat race, if you come in first place, than a rat is all you will be." ~DeVotchka
Who wants to be a rat? In the sense of someone being mean, stomping on toes and heads to get somewhere, throwing away love and relationships to be "better" than everyone around him.
The same teacher also told me that at the end of the day LOVE is the only thing that really matters, and I think he is right and to add to that he mentioned the importance of human connection and relationships.
I think I've also come to the conclusion that I would prefer to be happy and filled with a life of love than one filled with money, or a large amounts of control over something. I would prefer to be unknown than swallowed up in fame and prestige, in an image, in people gossipping or undermining me.
So all of you out there, if you are feeling like you haven't done a lot, make a list of everything you HAVE done and go over it. Make a list of things you HAVEN'T done that you wanted to by now and then start making them happen, or think what their importance is to you right now. Ask yourself, does it matter so much now that I know what I know?
you're such an over achiever, Bec! :P
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